The kind of email corporations get

[The show report is coming along – we are at about halfway through the 3rd day. Check it out and let us know what you think so far, if you get a chance: CES 2008 Show Report ]

We get emails like this all the time.

“Hello,

I searching through search engine and found your website that sell some
products that i need. So I decide to purchase that product from you.
Before i place some order, i have several question below:
1. Your company able sent the goods to outside your country?
2. Shipment by UPS or FedEx?
3. Are you accepting Visa and Mastercard as payment?
4. How can i get some discount for this purchase?

Please let me know your further information for my inquiry soon.

Best Regards,
Joseph”

Translated this means:

“Hello,”

Hi,

“I searching through search engine and found your website that sell some
products that i need. So I decide to purchase that product from you.”

The software I downloaded that searches for small businesses on the web found your site and then sent this badly written email I copied and modified a little in case you already are wary of the amazingly similar original.

“Before i place some order, i have several question below:”

Before I actually spend any time trying to steal from you, I need you to indicate just how stupid you are.

“1. Your company able sent the goods to outside your country?”

Do you send products to places where you can be easily ripped off because of lack of enforcement of certain credit card laws?

“2. Shipment by UPS or FedEx?”

I will mention a few reputable companies to make me look reputable.

“3. Are you accepting Visa and Mastercard as payment?”

Are you extraordinarily ignorant of credit card scams?

“4. How can i get some discount for this purchase?”

A real customer would ask for a discount, so I am asking for a discount so I look like a real customer [this is actually more advanced than 90% of all of these emails]

“Please let me know your further information for my inquiry soon.”

Please respond if you are an easy mark. I want more money now.

“Best Regards,
Joseph”

Please send me your free products,
Automated Ripoffs Incorporated